Slay The Goat

But as I sit in a dimly lit room with a mirror facing me and look at my reflection, I can't help but feel like my most significant threat is me. It's as if I've been in a battle where it's me vs. me, a struggle to determine who I truly am. It's just two weeks now before we go to war and lately, I've been feeling like my time in pro wrestling is coming to an end. Maybe it was because I was doubting myself after Mac and I lost the WGWF Tag Team Championships just as quickly as we won them, maybe the voices in my head and the critics outside my head like Matt Knox were starting to get to me when they referred to me as just a guy. Maybe it was just everything combined and I had fallen into a deep self-pity state of mind.


As I look at myself in the mirror I ask myself over and over who I am, Am I the Bam Miller who constantly fails to live up to the hype, Am I the Bam Miller who constantly lets his friends down because I never can come through when it matters the most. Is as if I'm cursed to be a failure ever since I was born and left to rot in a dumpster by my parents. No matter how hard I try to escape my past it catches back up to me and puts me right back into that dumpster. It's like I'm on an endless loop of despair.


Suddenly the door to the room opens up and the love in my life Kat Jones walks in, taking her time as she shakes her head at me sulking. She kneels down before me and takes her finger to lift my head up and looks me in my eyes.


Kat Jones: Look at me and not yourself in the mirror right now because you aren't seeing what I see Bam, You've been looking more depressed and defeated since you loss those WGWF Tag Team Championships and I know you think you disappointed Mac and think you will do the same again but the entire team for Us vs Them still believes in you and you want to know why?


I look at her and nod my head in a yes motion.


Kat Jones: It's because I know you've been doubted your entire life, ever since you was born people expected you to fail at life. Your parents left you for dead but you survived, The Catholic Foster Home saw you as nothing more than a trouble-making kid that would end up dead or in jail but you didn't. When you first laced up your first pair of boots they thought there is no way this kid would make it out the indy scene but look at you now. Take a really good look at yourself now in the mirror.


Kat makes me look at myself now in the mirror as she does the same.


Kat Jones: I see someone that's been an underdog all his life, I see someone that's had the odds stacked against him every step of the way in life, and each time you've defied the odds and even when you stumbled and fallen you've always raised back up and got back into the fight. So pick yourself up now because CCPE needs you for Us vs. Them! We need that never-back-down attitude of yours, we need that underdog to walk into Us vs. Them ready to slay a Goat!


She gives me a kiss on the cheek and then stands up to take her leave out of the room but before she does, she leaves me a picture of James Raven in my hand.


Kat Jones: This is your redemption story love, dont let it end the same way as last year.


I watch as shelves out the room and then I turn my attention to the picture of James Raven, one of the few wrestlers in this industry that could call themselves the Goat and nobody would question it or argue about it. For decades he's racked up Championship after Championship, big win after big win, and memorial moment after memorial moment. There is nothing in this business that James Raven hasn't been able to do and it's just a testament to his greatness. Many have tried to test it and be the one that gets a career-changing win over him and I know firsthand how hard that is, my fiesta attempt to slay James Raven was last year around this time at XWF Relentless when we competed in a gimmick match that didn't warrant any real skill but luck but regardless of the rules Raven still rose to the top and I was left in the middle of the ring to reflect on my shortcomings once again.


I look at myself in the mirror once more.


Ever since that day, I vowed to become a better pro wrestler, for over a year I've been training to improve my in-ring skill, I've studied the history of this business to improve my IQ and put my body through hell to withstand as much pain as possible. I've faced the likes of Jason Cashe, Mac Bane, Buster Gloves, your Wife Atara, and more recently The Show Stealerz. I've taken on every level of competition head-on and yeah I've loss some of those battles but it was all necessary to get me ready for this match, This match is the most significant in my career so far and I need this win more than you need it right now James,. You have established yourself as a Goat in this business, and your legacy is forever intact but for me, this is my time to show the world my legacy is more than just a tough guy who will give you a run for your money and I'm tired of that narrative I really am. My legacy is on the line and I like to get the narrative of a loser off my back but I can only do that by slaying the legendary Goat of this business. Big matches like this don't come around often for someone like me. I'm no bum don't get me wrong but I'm not considered a marquee name in this industry yet but I've been trying. Crawling and scratching my way to the top and I can't let this opportunity slip by me again, This is a chance for me to stand out among some of the elite in this business. I can not let James set my career back again I don't need that and it's not just me that will be affected. My teammates are counting on me to come through for them, they need this manic in there to provide them the spark they need to keep momentum on our side. I couldn't live with my defeat James and its brought me back to you but I must say I'm not sure if it brought me back to the same James Raven that I once knew.


I smirk as I look at the picture of James Raven.


You see James I've been keeping tabs on you, watching every move you make and seeing every match you've competed in since we last saw each other. You seem to have stumbled for the mountain top of greatness since our last encounter, each time you have taken the ring recently you have looked like a former shell of yourself. I saw it when you took on Peter Vaughn at CCPE vs The World he bested you and made you past the torch to him but many wrote it off as a bad day for you, a fluke some would call it, but then you went up against Tara Fenix at The Denzel Porter Invitational and you were on the receiving end of the biggest upset in recent memory. Tara Fenix defeated The Goat James Raven an outcome nobody saw coming, it was a shock that led to many asking is James Raven finished. Has he lost a step or two and is now just a guy with a name that once meant something?



I smile with a grin as I look into the mirror.


You see James from my point of view you no longer have the love for this business, you dont like doing what is required to stay at the top of the industry anymore or hell to even hang with the likes of Tara Fenix it seems. You just out here giving half-ass effort in all your matches and showing that you are ready to head out into the sunset, I don't know why you haven't just left your boots in the ring and taken your palace in the Hall of Fame but maybe you are just arrogant that you think you're good enough to still hang with the best in pro wrestling at your very worst but you of all people should know, once you stop giving your love to pro wrestling, pro wrestling loses its love for you. So you will not get a grade ovation on your way out because you no longer want to give this great sport your blood, sweat and tears anymore.


I stand up and look into the mirror with a focused look.





But I will James and it's because pro wrestling has always been my escape, I needed it from the hell I grew up in, there was never a doubt in my mind that all the late nights sneaking to watch wrestling was worth it. No matter what punishment my guardian would have for me I was prepared to take it but one night at the age of sixteen I snuck out to go to a local wrestling indy show, That night I knew I wanted to be a professional wrestler. Seeing people being paid to inflict pain and punishment on each other intrigued me so much that night set the course for me to become who I am today and who I am today is every pro wrestler's worst nightmare once the bell rings! I am a weapon made out of hate and suffering for the sole purpose of inflicting Pain and at US vs Them I’m going to be the ultimate weapon that will unleash all that pain and suffering against you, I am going to bring the hand of God down on you Raven, Im going to take you out to that old country road and I'm going to take you out of you misery. At US vs Them I'm going to put the final nail in your coffin and turn the final chapter in the storybook of James Raven.


I pull a light out of my pocket and set the picture of James Raven on fire and then drop it to the ground and watch it burn away as the scene fades into the dark.